G.I.V.E. Get Involved, Volunteer in Education

Everyone Benefits When Kids Mentor Kids

By Colette M. Weir, Parents' Source, September 20, 1999

It's been said that no one makes it in America without some kind of mentor.Whenever successful people look back, they recall those individuals who influenced their development, even if they knew each other for only a short time. They remember someone other than their parents who touched their lives in a positive way - someone who was "a wise and trusted friend and guide."

Although traditional mentoring pairs young people with adults, there is a growing number of opportunities for kids to mentor kids. Elementary school programs like "Book Buddies" encourage 4th- and 5th-graders to read to kids in kindergarten through 3rd grade. High school clubs like "Homework Helpers" get students involved in tutoring younger children - and their peers, too. The Girl Scouts, Boy Scouts, Girls and Boys Club, YM/YWCA, and similar organizations offer a variety of opportunities that are available to teens and college students who are interested in working with children. Mature adults supervise these kid-to-kid programs to ensure that the relationships are a positive experience for both the mentors and mentees.

One of the keys to kid-to-kid mentoring programs is that children usually bond more quickly to a young person than to an adult. The mentees are more comfortable, less intimidated by someone closer to their own age. They regard the mentor as a role model or a friend rather than a teacher or a parent substitute. Youth mentors have the ability to look at problems and solutions from a kid's perspective. They often have similar interests and can communicate on the same level. Kid-to-kid mentoring relationships boost the mentors' self-esteem by giving them a sense of purpose, an opportunity to help someone else.

I speak firsthand of these mutual benefits."Buddy" Smith and I were in the same 5th-grade class. At the end of the first rating period, our teacher, Mr. Stevens, suggested that Buddy and I start doing our Math homework together. He thought that Buddy could possibly improve in Math, if the problems and solutions were presented from a kid's perspective. I'll always remember the expression on Buddy's face when our teacher announced our Math grades. "Bittner - A. Faust - C...." By the time Mr. Stevens read Carol Martin's grade, Buddy's teeth were already clenched. He appeared to be bracing himself for the "D" or "F" that had all too often accompanied his name since the 1st grade. "...Richards - C. Smith - B. Stahler (me)..." - who knows? I didn't hear my own grade, and I didn't care. Buddy got a B! The look on his face was unforgettable. He was amazed and proud, and so was I. Buddy and I experienced the rewards of kid-to-kid mentoring, thanks to the insight of our teacher. As Buddy's understanding of Math grew, so did his confidence and self-esteem. By the end of that school year, his grades had improved dramatically in every subject. My self-esteem had been boosted too, because my talents had been recognized.

Children who have a positive experience as a mentee or as a mentor are more likely to realize the value of the relationship and take on roles as mentors when they become adults. There are presently about 13.6 million U.S. youth under 18 who are labeled "at risk". The majority of these children are basically good kids, many with great potential, who need caring adults to help them learn how to make healthy decisions. America's Promise includes a commitment to reach 2 million mentors by the year 2000, by driving corporations, schools, churches and non-profits to expand mentoring.

Although most of the publicity about mentoring focuses on notable professionals working with disadvantaged youth, there is a variety of programs to fit the different lifestyles and interests of mentors and mentees. The traditional form of mentoring pairs one young person with an adult. In team mentoring, several mentors are assigned to a group of mentees. If one mentor has to miss a session, another can fill in. For school-based and work-based mentoring, the school partners with a company or organization that provides the mentors. Although activities are usually geared toward academics, older students can work on technical skills, career development or college applications.

The results of the first national study of mentoring in the early 1990's proved that young people's lives are enriched by mentoring. Youth who met regularly with a mentor were 46% less likely to begin using illegal drugs, 52% less likely to skip school, and 33% less likely to get into fights. Students with mentors reported greater confidence in their performance at school and better relations with their families. Similar research of students involved in Proctor & Gamble's Cincinnati school-based mentoring programs revealed that 100% were more likely to stay in school, achieve and aspire to better grades - 86% of the senior class went on to college, compared to the 25 to 30% who went to college before the program was instituted.

As parents we are responsible for providing our children with the assets and skills that they need to succeed in tomorrow's world. Many of today's parenting issues are much more challenging than those that our parents dealt with. When our children have needs or interests that are beyond our areas of expertise, we must be willing to find programs and people who can help fulfill those needs.

For information on local mentoring programs, contact your child's school or any one of the youth organizations named above. Or, visit The National Mentoring Partnership's Website at http://www.mentoring.org.

Colette M. Weir is Communications Manager for Girl Scouts - Great Valley Council

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